Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Scumbag

"I already asked you for leave yesterday," Lin Jianyuan said as evenly as he could. "Company policy says the sick note can be filed when I report back. I didn't even have to come in today."

"But the company also requires an official sick note before you can take leave," Jiang Chen said with a contemptuous curl of his lip. "We send people to the hospital to verify. None of that 'a doctor friend wrote it for me' crap, and if anything doesn't line up—the registration time doesn't match the slip, whatever—it won't fly."

"What are you getting at?" Lin Jianyuan's heartbeat kicked up. The balloon in his chest swelled and swelled.

"No ulterior motive—I'm just being kind and reminding you: if you're caught faking it, you'll lose your attendance bonus, get fined double, and have twenty percent docked from your year-end," Jiang Chen sneered. "Don't say I didn't warn you. It's all crystal clear in the company rules."

"You're targeting me!" Lin Jianyuan couldn't hold it in anymore; he roared, "What gives you the right to say I'm faking? How the hell do you know whether I'm sick or not?!"

"Do you look sick to you?!" Jiang Chen slapped the desk and snapped back, "Lin Jianyuan! Don't think five years here makes you an elder the company can't run without! I'm telling you—everyone follows the rules!"

They were both shouting now. The whole open office fell silent, watching with mixed, complicated looks.

"I can vouch for Yuan-ge! He really looked awful yesterday!" From the corner, Pei Shuo suddenly stood up.

He was tall, and the moment he rose, every eye swung to him.

He went on, "And in the meeting yesterday he did say he'd be out for two days! I heard it!"

"Actually... me too." On the other side, the female colleague Qin Shi raised her hand timidly.

"Yeah! I heard it too!" The account manager Su Zhiwei—who usually bows and scrapes to clients—shot to his feet, face flushed, veins standing out on his neck. "He asked for two days, period! Lin Jianyuan was so damn exhausted he ended up in the hospital! What's wrong with taking two sick days? Is that a crime?!"

"Yeah! Exactly!"

"Exactly! Everyone's seen how many days he's been going nonstop! It's inhumane for the company to hound him like this! And where's the overtime pay when we work late?!"

"Oh, great—" Seeing his subordinates riled up, Jiang Chen's composure slipped. Snarling, he jabbed a finger at Pei Shuo and thundered, "Lin Jianyuan! So you're building cliques now! If I'd known, I never should've let you mentor the rookie! Look what you've turned him into—leading the charge to defy a superior! Don't forget he's still an intern! Do you know what happens when you egg on a newcomer like this? Who do you think you are!"

Everyone speaking up for Lin Jianyuan had been at the company for over three years; only Pei Shuo was an intern who could be fired at any moment.

When Lin Jianyuan heard him use Pei Shuo as leverage, the balloon in his chest burst.

He lunged forward, seized Jiang Chen by the collar, and bellowed, "Who am I?! You know who I am?!"

Jiang Chen froze. Everyone around them froze too—did Lin Jianyuan have someone powerful behind him?

But before anyone could react, Lin Jianyuan dug a warm, sticky lump out of his pocket and rammed it straight into Jiang Chen's mouth!

"You dare cross me? Do you know who I am?" Lin Jianyuan roared. "I'm a fucking lunatic!"

Plop. A steaming lump slid off Jiang Chen’s face and hit the floor. Fluttering down with it was that flimsy medical diagnosis certificate.

Jiang Chen’s eyes were about to pop; everyone else present was stunned speechless.

"Holy shit, 700 Jiangchuan North Road... you're for real!" Qin Shi gaped, the corners of her mouth twitching up into a grin she couldn’t suppress, and snuck Lin Jianyuan a thumbs-up.

"Y-you—" Jiang Chen stared at Lin Jianyuan in disbelief; a beat later it hit him and he started retching, yanking tissues by the handful and shrieking.

Without a backward glance, Lin Jianyuan booted the door and walked out.

"Yuan-ge... Yuan-ge!" Pei Shuo ran after him, all the way to the restroom.

Bent over the sink, Lin Jianyuan washed his hands, catching Pei Shuo’s ecstatic face in the mirror.

Water roared, sluicing the sticky gunk clean off his hands.

Lin Jianyuan shut off the tap and straightened, grumbling, "I dragged you into this. You’ll probably have to take the hit with me this time. Sorry, man."

"It's fine! Doesn't matter!" Pei Shuo bounded over, eyes blazing. "Bro, you were so badass! You're a straight-up hero! Damn shame I didn't get it on video! Man, for real, you floored me with how cool you were, bro! You're a hero!!! Bro! I'm gonna model myself on you forever! You're so damn cool, seriously!!"

He was so hyped he was babbling, repeating the same lines like a broken record—fully conveying the author's admiration.

Crushed in his bear hug, all Lin Jianyuan could think was how rock-hard the kid’s pecs were. Fuck—how are all these youngsters so jacked these days???

With a wry smile, Lin Jianyuan pushed him off, wanting to say something but not sure what.

"But bro, how come what you stuffed in his mouth was an egg pancake? I thought it was shit..." Pei Shuo’s eyes sparkled.

Only then did Lin Jianyuan notice the two vines in Pei Shuo’s eyes were still there—and looked thicker and longer than yesterday.

"Because shoving shit in someone’s mouth is a crime," Lin Jianyuan said offhandedly. "Honestly, at first that was exactly what I planned."

But fresh, still-warm dog crap is just too rank. In the neighborhood he only managed to pick up two logs before giving up.

With something that foul in his pocket, there was no way he’d get through security or onto the subway.

He’d actually decided to drop it, but Jiang Chen pushed it way too far. He lost control and, on impulse, whipped out the egg pancake that had been mashed to pulp on the subway.

The pancake was loaded with sweet bean paste—Lin Jianyuan loved the stuff. The gluey brown paste mixed with the squashed pancake really did look like a steaming pile of dog shit.

Jiang Chen was probably so blindsided by the sudden violence that he screamed like someone who’d just had a mouthful of shit rammed in.

"Oh, illegal? Then forget it. But the egg pancake was sweet! Heh heh, I love watching scumbags get their faces slapped like that!" Pei Shuo grinned with relish.

Watching those two vines wriggle in his eyes, Lin Jianyuan couldn’t take it anymore—he reached out and gave one a yank.

It actually came out!

Staring at the vine thrashing in his palm, stunned, Lin Jianyuan blurted, "Pei Shuo?"

"Mm?"

"Do you feel unwell?"

"Huh?" Pei Shuo blinked, surprised. "No. Bro, what did you just grab? Was there a mosquito?" He looked around, puzzled.

The bathroom was quiet, just the two of them. Lin Jianyuan studied Pei Shuo’s eyes; those bling-bling puppy-dog eyes had gone back to how they’d been at the start, nothing out of the ordinary.

So that fixed it? Turns out yanking it out doesn’t do any harm?

If I’d known, I wouldn’t have been so soft…

Lin Jianyuan let out a breath in secret, but Pei Shuo suddenly said, "By the way, bro, don't worry about me. A boss who doesn’t treat people like people—give him to me for free and I still wouldn’t work under him. But just now, when all the older guys and gals stood up for you, that was so badass it got me fired up. If we have to leave, I’ll actually be a bit reluctant to part with them... Anyway, don’t feel bad. If I get fired, I’ll just find another job! I’ve still got fresh-graduate status—it’ll be easy for me to land something."

He was obviously trying to comfort him. As if finding a job were easy now.

He hadn’t expected to be consoled by an intern several years younger than him. Lin Jianyuan gave a wry smile and said, "All right. We’ll take it one step at a time."

Pei Shuo: "Mm!"

Lin Jianyuan left the company and took the subway home again. It was nearly noon; the train wasn’t crowded. He found a seat, and thinking back on what had happened, his mood was a little complicated.

After what he did to Jiang Chen, never mind Pei Shuo—he himself was going to be in serious trouble. Jiang Chen was probably reporting him to headquarters right now to get him fired. Fuck it—fire me then. He couldn’t stand another day working under Jiang Chen anyway.

If you’re fired in a situation like this, do you still get severance pay?

There wasn’t much money in Lin Jianyuan’s account, and this month he’d started on meds. After being provoked by that dumbass Jiang Chen today, his condition had probably worsened. What if a month on medication didn’t help—then what? Would he actually end up genuinely insane?

Waving a mental-illness certificate and going nuts anywhere, big or small, would be a thrill, sure—but getting fired and not finding work would not.

This month’s rent wasn’t paid yet—oh right, and last month’s credit card bill had to be paid first. Good thing the rent hadn’t gone up...

Thinking of rent made him think of the new roommate, of how the guy had brushed him off with “I don’t have WeChat.”

What a lousy excuse. He couldn’t tell if the guy’s EQ was just low or if he had zero intention of getting along with his roommate.

The more he thought, the more blocked-up his chest felt. He couldn’t help a long sigh, tipped his head back against the subway seat, and raised a hand to shield his eyes from the bright, stabbing fluorescents.

The balloon in his chest had burst, then shriveled back in, limp and lodged there.

Let it all end, thought Lin Jianyuan.

If the world ended right this second, there wouldn’t be so much crap to deal with.

Lin Jianyuan got back to the complex he rented in. It was noon; his stomach was empty, but he had no appetite.

He hadn’t even had breakfast—in fact, his breakfast had ended up splattered across Jiang Chen’s face.

Thinking of Jiang Chen’s expression then, he couldn’t help wanting to laugh again. Grinning, he slid the key into the lock. Click, the door opened.

"You’re back."

The digestive system lifted its “head,” smiling to greet him.

Lin Jianyuan: "..."

No matter how many times he saw it, this wad of pink offal was still pretty horrifying.

He gave a perfunctory reply, changed his shoes, and was about to head back to his room.

"How come you step out once and come back hauling so much bad energy?" The pink offal edged closer, voice bright with interest, and Lin Jianyuan felt as if he were being inspected. The pink offal said, "Work give you grief?"

Lin Jianyuan thought, you ever heard of boundaries? Are we even close? ...Oh, right—the offal’s raw. Getting fresh with me, isn’t he?

His own lame joke made him snort. He smothered the smile tugging at his mouth and said perfunctorily, "Yeah. Got in a fight."

Pink offal: "Quarreling gets you this angry, huh. There's also irritability, suffocation, powerlessness. No hope in sight."

That was so strangely put that Lin Jianyuan couldn’t help turning his head to look at him.

"What?" The pink offal’s mouth hooked into a small smile.

A lump of digestive system talking like a person was just too bizarre...

Wait, no! That isn’t a digestive system—it's a person!

The realization hit him: he wasn’t staring at actual pink offal but at a living, breathing human being.

New roommate, after all; they’d be seeing each other day in and day out. Lin Jianyuan drew a deep breath, collected himself, and said, "Since you’ve moved in, even if you won’t add me on WeChat, at least tell me your name. And about this morning—I had no other agenda trying to get your contact, so don’t overthink it."

It’s not like he was cold-pitching gym memberships on the street. Lin Jianyuan couldn’t help griping to himself—why so guarded?

"My name is—" the pink offal’s lips curved again, the slight upturn surprisingly pretty, "Xie Yu."

Xie Yu?

What a weird name. How was it written?

Was Xie even a surname? Xie, like the character for "slanted"? And Yu, as in jade?

He instinctively wanted to ask and make sure, but figured he’d just get shot down again. So he sniffed and said, "Got it. Anyway, welcome. Hope we get along."

Lin Jianyuan turned to go in, and behind him the pink offal said, "You? What’s your name?"

Only then did he realize he hadn’t introduced himself. He looked back. "Lin Jianyuan."

"Lin Jianyuan," the pink offal repeated, as if savoring the name. The tender pink esophagus exposed to the air even rippled slightly, as though it had actually swallowed something.

This was just... downright creepy!

Lin Jianyuan began to wonder what freak-show nonsense he’d watched earlier to throw him into hallucinations this outrageous.

The killer part was how real the details felt—since when did he know human anatomy this well?

"Mm, I’m going to crash for a bit—I’m dead tired. Do you usually order in or cook? If you cook, remember to turn on the range hood or the landlord will get annoyed."

He finished with a yawn; he was wiped. He gave a wave and went into his room.

The instant he burrowed under the covers, a thought flashed through his head.

Maybe it wasn’t the character for “slanted”, but rather for “carry”? That would be even stranger as a name, but Lin Jianyuan liked it more for some reason. It had a vivid feel—like those old-time lines: a gentleman fair as jade, peerless in the world... that ancient-style heartthrob vibe.

Come to think of it, he still didn’t know what the guy actually looked like. To him it was pink offal; in reality, what did the guy look like?

Somehow, an image surfaced: a young man with very pale skin, a slim waist, and long legs.

His hair should be a touch long too, loose enough to tie into a small, casual ponytail. When he smiles, the curve of his mouth is really something—he just naturally gives off that effortless fuckboy vibe.

…What a load of nonsense.

Lin Jianyuan figured those cheesy, over-the-top plotlines from the fantasy costume dramas Pei Shuo kept describing had probably rotted his brain. He smiled to himself, and before long he sank into sleep.

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Translator's Note: ML is named 邪域 (xié yù), which roughly means "wicked domain". When other aberrants/people who know what ML is refer to him, I'll use "Blight Realm".

LJY, however, doesn't know this guy is a monster yet, so he just assumes that "Xie Yu" is an odd name. He doesn't know the exact characters for this name either because there are homonyms, and therefore assumes that "Xie" refers to the characters that mean slant/carry rather than "wicked", and "Yu" refers to the character that means jade, rather than "domain".