Chapter 73

Chapter 73: Influential “Mother”

Of course, the fountain in Taoran Street was swallowed whole by his roommate.

Lin Jianyuan had been in a rush to get home and sleep, so he’d completely forgotten about it.

It was only when the director brought it up that he remembered—he’d seen the local trending topics blowing up about last night’s viral night market incident.

After all, evacuating a huge crowd was one thing, but explaining away the sudden disappearance of the massive fountain at the center of the pedestrian street was impossible.

The director had been more than patient, waiting until now to ask him for a written explanation.

PR must be losing their minds by now.

Whatever. No point making life harder for another working stiff.

Lin Jianyuan picked up his phone, opened the AI app, and started dictating:

"Under orders from the Bureau, I went to Taoran Street to apprehend Aberrant [Remorse]. The target was too powerful, so I summoned my wife, who swallowed him whole. But his mouth is too big, so he accidentally swallowed the fountain too. The fountain didn't taste good, so he spat it out on the way back to the Bureau. By then, it was already in pieces, partially digested, so it couldn't be put back together. That's why we didn't return it to Taoran Street. Please write all of this up as an official report for the Bureau, since they're asking where the fountain went."

A few seconds later, the AI finished processing and spat out a report.

Lin Jianyuan copied and forwarded it with a single tap.

Director, after receiving the report: "Received."

Director, after reading the report: "??? Why swallow the whole fountain?"

Lin Jianyuan: "Would you feel better if we only swallowed half?"

Director: "So where did you spit it out?"

Lin Jianyuan: "Weren't you going to give me two minutes?"

Director could only say, "Fine. Whatever, it's ruined anyway. If we can't recover it, we can't recover it."

Director: "Don't go dumping trash everywhere next time!"

Lin Jianyuan: "Got it."

Let the people on the clock handle work problems.

Lin Jianyuan and his roommate went right back to enjoying their vacation.

Maybe it was the reverse flag he’d set, or maybe the level-two bronze lock really worked.

Either way, the Bureau didn’t call them back for overtime even once in the days that followed.

Absolute bliss!

Once they’d had their fill of fun, the Bureau’s online courses wrapped up. Next came practical training and physical fitness.

He also needed to meet with a real estate agent. Over the past few days, Lin Jianyuan had been talking with agents whenever he had a moment, considering both renting and buying.

The agent could tell right away he’d struck it rich overnight, so the response was enthusiastic.

Lin Jianyuan set up a time to view apartments, then headed back to City A with his roommate.

They got back at night, but there was nothing urgent on the schedule for tomorrow.

He could take another day off, then the day after tomorrow, he’d sit the Bureau’s final theory exam. After that, the theory section would be completely done.

Lin Jianyuan could feel himself settling into the Bureau’s rhythm.

“Babe, I’ll tidy up around the house tomorrow,” Lin Jianyuan said. “Then when you’re off, let’s go check out some apartments together.”

His roommate never seemed to say no to him.

He smiled gently, lips curving. “Okay.”

Coming back from a luxury mountain hotel to this tiny, shabby old apartment was a shock to the eyes.

But not to the heart.

Lin Jianyuan realized he still thought of this place as home, especially when he saw the cleaning robot buzzing around.

No. He knew the real reason.

Because this was where he’d met and fallen in love with his roommate.

Ninety percent of their story had unfolded right here, so even if the place was tiny, run-down, and overpriced, to Lin Jianyuan it was packed with memories and warmth.

He almost wanted to buy it.

But there was no need.

What he couldn’t let go of was the memories he’d made here with his roommate.

Now, the person who mattered most was right beside him. They’d keep walking forward together, cherishing each other.

They’d keep making new, happier memories, over and over again.

So why cling to the old vessel for those memories?

"Come on! Let’s shoot a vlog!"

Suddenly wide awake, Lin Jianyuan grabbed his floppy roommate.

"Hmm?" His roommate had just finished making the bed. "What’s a vlog?"

Lin Jianyuan: "It’s a video diary—just a way to record our life for our future selves."

Angel Eyeball: "You two are such a couple."

Angel Eyeball again: "Wait, why are you holding me for your vlog?"

Lin Jianyuan: "Eyeball, camera mode on."

Angel Eyeball: "I’m not... whatever."

What’s that human saying again?

Making money is hard, eating shit is harder.

No, wait. It doesn’t even get paid.

Lin Jianyuan, that heartless capitalist, didn’t even pay it a salary!

Angel Eyeball switched to camera mode with tears in its eye, hovering smoothly between Lin Jianyuan and Xie Yu, built-in stabilization engaged.

"This is where I first met my wife!"

Gacha—

Lin Jianyuan flung open the door, pretending to come home.

His voice overflowed with happiness.

"The first time I saw Xie Yu was right here. That day, I’d just had a huge fight with my idiot boss at work..."

His roommate’s little tail swayed back and forth.

Off-camera, Lin Jianyuan called out, "Be serious! Stop wiggling! You didn’t even know how to wiggle when you first met me!"

On camera, his roommate tried not to laugh. "Okay, okay."

He did his best to tuck away his tail.

Lin Jianyuan grabbed Angel Eyeball, aiming it at himself and his roommate.

He held it close for a selfie shot with both of them in frame:

"And then he saw me and said—"

Roommate: "You’re back."

Lin Jianyuan: "He said, 'You’re back!'"

Roommate: "Do you want to shower, eat, or... me first?"

Lin Jianyuan burst out laughing. "He said, 'Do you want to shower, eat, or me first!' Hahahahaha..."

Roommate: "Hahahaha..."

On the vlog, the two of them were a mess of laughter.

Off-camera, the shabby little apartment turned into a ship.

Drifting through a sea of laughter and happiness.

……

The next day.

Lin Jianyuan still had a day off, but his roommate had to go back to work.

They were in different departments, so their training schedules didn’t line up. His roommate had to return a day earlier.

No big deal. Teleportation made everything easy.

His roommate could even come back for lunch.

Maybe I’ll cook for him at lunch today?

Lin Jianyuan thought, excited. What should I make for my wife?

He was lazily packing when his phone rang.

It was the landlord.

"Lin Jianyuan, have you made up your mind?" The landlord’s tone was aggressive, picking a fight right from the start. "Are you renewing or moving out?"

Lin Jianyuan: "."

Oops, he’d forgotten to tell the landlord.

They’d gotten rich overnight, but too quietly, so he hadn’t had a chance to tell the landlord the good news about their new three hundred—no, four hundred—annual income.

Lin Jianyuan told him straight out they weren’t renewing. They’d move out in the next couple of days.

The landlord sounded surprised, but quickly got his nasty tone back. "Fine. I’ll come by soon to check the place. Clean up! Don’t leave any trash! If the place’s a mess, I’m not giving your deposit back!"

Lin Jianyuan: "..."

Lin Jianyuan glanced at the date, speechless.

It was Monday. Ten in the morning.

Who knew how long "soon" meant, but one thing was clear—the landlord had no intention of giving him time to clean.

Lin Jianyuan pictured his old self.

If he hadn’t changed jobs.

If he hadn’t gotten rich overnight.

If his life wasn’t steady and happy now.

He’d be absolutely furious right now.

Lin Jianyuan: "."

He was fired up.

He empathized with himself from ten days ago—his fists clenched instantly!

He almost wanted to take a dump in the living room, cash out his deposit in fifty-cent coins, dump them on the landlord’s head, and tell him to eat shit—while it’s still warm!

But then he remembered—the apartment held all his memories with his roommate. The landlord was an asshole, but the apartment was innocent.

Besides, the place was clean. His wife was too good—he kept the place spotless every day.

Not to mention the cleaning robot.

At most, he just had to hit a button and let the robot mop again.

Lin Jianyuan kept packing.

Before long, the landlord showed up.

He just unlocked the door and walked right in.

The key jammed into the lock with a rough twist.

Lin Jianyuan heard the lock click from his bedroom and frowned.

Shit. Didn’t even bother to knock, just used the spare key. What an asshole.

He knew it was the landlord and couldn’t be bothered to greet him. Just kept packing.

Sure enough, the landlord’s grating voice echoed from the living room.

"Well, well, Lin Jianyuan," the landlord sneered. "Got a cleaning robot here too? Win it in a company raffle?"

Lin Jianyuan: "None of your fucking business."

The landlord hadn’t expected that—he looked stunned.

He walked in, checked the kitchen, then peeked into his roommate’s room.

Then he headed to Lin Jianyuan’s room.

"Why do you have so much junk?" the landlord complained, face twisted with disgust. "How long are you going to take? You want me to waste my whole day here waiting for you?"

Lin Jianyuan: "Not my fucking problem."

Landlord: "..."

Lin Jianyuan kept packing at his own pace.

The landlord eyed him suspiciously.

Something was off.

This kid wasn’t acting like usual.

He’d never seemed this gutsy before.

The landlord thought back to how he used to be.

No, this guy used to be a meek little office worker, broke as hell, always working overtime.

He’d been able to squeeze him for higher and higher rent because the kid was always too busy and tired to look for a new place.

The landlord had figured he could keep milking him.

But now he suddenly had a backbone? Just decided to move out like that?

Maybe he won the lottery.

The landlord smirked. "So, kid, you got a new place lined up? Where you moving—some luxury mansion?"

Lin Jianyuan didn’t even look up. "None of your fucking business."

Landlord: "I’m just being concerned, you know. We’ve known each other for years..."

Lin Jianyuan: "Not my fucking problem."

Landlord: "..."

The landlord realized—

No matter what he said, Lin Jianyuan only ever answered with "Not my fucking problem" or "None of your fucking business!"

Lin Jianyuan was straight-up roasting him!

The landlord exploded, pushing off the doorframe and yelling, "Lin Jianyuan! What’s your motherfucking problem? You keep repeating the same two shitty lines! What’s your fucking attitude? I’m trying to talk to you, what the hell are you doing? Can you motherfucking speak like a normal person, fuck! You broke-ass loser who can’t afford a house! Dumbass! Useless piece of shit! You motherfucker, show me some fucking respect!"

Lin Jianyuan paused.

It was as if the word "mother" summoned something deep inside him.

He turned around.

And, calm as ever, said something other than "Not my fucking problem" or "None of your fucking business" for the first time.

"Fuck your mother."

Landlord: "..."

That finally pushed the landlord over the edge.