Chapter 81

Chapter 81: Have You Finished Reading the Thesis?

The shrill beeping of the mobile terminal jolted the director out of his mindless scrolling through short videos.

The director, lost in silly laughter while watching short videos, was startled by the buzzing of his mobile terminal.

What now, what happened?!

Did something go wrong again?!

The director hurriedly grabbed his device and saw a new approval request, sent through the fast-track channel reserved for senior staff.

The title read: "Application for Emergency Development of Insect Repellent Shampoo."

Director: "?"

A huge question mark hung over his head. Before he could figure out what this meant, the internal comms buzzed again.

"Hello, Director, sorry to bother you, are you asleep?"

It was Lin Jianyuan.

His tone was oddly polite.

The director replied, "Not yet. What's up?"

Lin Jianyuan said, "Well, you know that new type of Aberrant we found today? It doesn't cause much mental contamination, but it keeps making people go bald. That can't go on, right? So I came up with an idea."

The director said, "Oh, you mean that floral... the clarifying shampoo formula, right?"

After all, he hadn't gotten to this position just by playing dumb and flattering his subordinates.

He immediately picked up on Lin Jianyuan's meaning.

"Got it, I'll approve it in a bit," the director said, genuinely touched.

He glanced at the clock: midnight!

Alright, alright.

Recruiting Lin Jianyuan had been a blessing for the Bureau.

Who else would stay up half the night worrying about the people's hair?

Seriously, who else!

The director hung up, ready to watch a few more videos.

He'd barely watched for a minute.

Beep beep—

His terminal buzzed again.

Lin Jianyuan: "Boss, please approve it as soon as possible! [fist][fist] Thanks! [flowers][flowers]"

Director: "..."

Is this really that urgent?

Of course, he couldn't say that out loud.

The director, well-versed in managing subordinates, replied patiently, "Reviewing now, please wait!"

Lin Jianyuan: "Okay! [flowers][flowers]"

Finishing his video with some reluctance, the director switched over to the approval screen.

He opened the attachment.

The system lagged for a moment.

Director: "?"

After a brief freeze, the system loaded a densely packed, image-filled, 128-page document titled "Application for Emergency Development of Insect Repellent Shampoo."

Director: "............."

No way.

One hundred and twenty-eight pages???

What is this, a doctoral dissertation?

Alright, fine.

Now the director's competitive streak was fully triggered.

He had to see what could possibly fill 128 pages!

He sat up in bed, face serious, and dove in.

Two minutes later, Director: "?"

Ten minutes later, Director: "??"

Oh, this is bad.

This was definitely aimed at him.

This really was a full-blown dissertation!

It had everything: cover page, declaration, abstract, keywords, table of contents, introduction, theoretical background, literature review, research design, data, and so on.

Even the formatting was textbook perfect!

The director's first thought was: Is Lin Jianyuan messing with me?

Second thought: No way, he's actually serious?!

A quick scan told the director that Lin Jianyuan wasn't joking.

He'd seriously written the abstract, the introduction, the review, and meticulously designed the entire R&D process.

Director: Huh? Wait, what?

Was Lin Jianyuan trying to kill him with hard work or what?!

The director hesitated for a second.

Only a second, because in the next instant, the taskmaster struck again.

Lin Jianyuan: "Boss, any suggestions for improvement? [grin][grin]"

Director: "..."

He hadn't even finished the abstract, but he couldn't admit that.

He knew Lin Jianyuan too well.

Lin Jianyuan, like Shi Shaoning, was the type to grumble and swear but always get the job done.

But he was also nothing like Shi Shaoning!

Shi Shaoning was a single idealist.

But Lin Jianyuan had a lovesick, fiercely protective wife who could flip the whole containment department if he got angry!

The director replied at once, "Hold on. I'm reading it carefully, need a bit more time. [fist][fist]"

The deeper he read, the more cold sweat broke out on his back.

Because he realized—

This dissertation—no, this "Application for Emergency Development of Insect Repellent Shampoo"—was written with real effort!

It was thorough. Rigorous.

And surprisingly practical!

Just the section on "How to retain the effect of the clarifying agent while keeping the insect repellent's signature scent and ensuring it's totally harmless to humans" ran for fifty pages, with multiple proposed solutions!

It was obvious the man had a real passion for insect repellent.

Director: "..."

He was drenched in sweat.

On the surface, Lin Jianyuan: "Boss, any suggestions for improvement? [fist][fist]"

In reality, Lin Jianyuan: "Useless! It's been five minutes, why aren't you done yet? Hurry up and learn! [angry][angry][angry]"

He got it now.

Lin Jianyuan wasn't a doting parent.

Lin Jianyuan was a high-energy advisor yanking him out of bed in the middle of the night to read papers!

But he couldn't just ignore it...

Lin Jianyuan had worked so hard, and the task was something he'd quietly dumped on him earlier that day. If he didn't read it and give feedback right away, Lin Jianyuan would explode, and if he exploded, his wife would definitely explode too...

But this thing was 128 pages long!

And it was a real scientific thesis!

He couldn't take it anymore.

After so many years as director, he finally let out the primal scream of a true corporate slave.

I can't take it!!!

This is driving me insane!!!

How am I supposed to live like this?!

Meanwhile—

At Lin Jianyuan's spacious apartment.

In the bedroom, the climate control kept everything at the perfect temperature.

The sheets, duvet, and pillows were all from that luxury hotel they'd ordered from.

Even the comforter had been secretly taken out and sun-dried by his wife earlier that day.

Now the whole bed smelled warm and fresh, like sun-baked linen.

"Ahh..." Lin Jianyuan rolled around on the big bed, hugging his wife, "This is amazing! Baby, you're the best! I love you so much!"

Roommate: "When did you meet that PhD guy?"

"Hm? The PhD?" Lin Jianyuan remembered the call from three hours ago. "Oh, that was a research department colleague I met by chance during our last visit to Internal Affairs. Shi Shaoning brought us—remember, you were there too."

He was a poor PhD student—well, almost a PhD—whose graduation kept getting delayed just because he was too competent for his own good.

He still hadn't graduated.

Being maliciously delayed was torture. He hadn't done anything wrong, but he'd lost out on several dream jobs because of it.

And what kind of bullshit reason was "too competent" for delaying someone’s graduation?

He'd tried to reason with his advisor, even appealed to the university.

But his advisor just gaslighted him and kept applying underhanded pressure.

His love for science clashed painfully with the harshness of reality.

He couldn't see a future, his mental state collapsed, and under the influence of the Aberrant, he nearly killed himself.

Luckily, the Bureau saved him.

Normally, they would have wiped his memory and sent him back to the lab, but after some counseling, this poor almost-PhD had a revelation.

He calmly said:

"You're right, I should value my life."

"I shouldn't jump alone. I should take that bastard with me—two for one."

The field agents in charge at the time were so freaked out they immediately reported up the chain.

And the one they reported to was Shi Shaoning.

When Shi Shaoning heard the story, he was furious, swearing nonstop, wishing he could punch that asshole advisor through the phone.

But venting was one thing—dealing with rotten advisors wasn't the Bureau's job.

After clearing up the Aberrant, everything else was officially out of their hands.

But Shi Shaoning really wanted to intervene.

Idealists can't stand to see other idealists suffer.

Lin Jianyuan, who happened to be nearby, chimed in, "He’s doing a PhD for the research anyway. Didn’t you just say the research department’s short on people? Why not check his specialty—maybe we can offer him a job. You never know, it might be a perfect fit."

And what do you know, it actually was.

The guy was in biopharmaceuticals. He started his PhD out of a love for research, only to realize he’d picked the wrong advisor.

His advisor just wanted a workhorse. What right does a workhorse have to talk about passion? Just graduate, get a job, and survive.

But the advisor turned out to be even more shameless than he’d imagined.

He was kept around for five years, just because he was too capable.

The advisor did everything possible to keep him close and cut off any chance for him to spread his wings.

He was gaslighted daily, subtly threatened, made to feel that even if he left, he’d be blacklisted.

Forget about a future in the field—even getting his degree or diploma seemed out of reach.

That’s how a promising, passionate researcher was driven to the edge, ready to drag his advisor off the roof with him.

As soon as Lin Jianyuan suggested it, the PhD student jumped at the chance.

He didn’t jump off any roofs—he just punched his advisor twice, threw his gloves in his face, and said, "I quit!"

And then, with style, he joined the research department.

The Bureau made sure he got his diploma and degree, and he took all his own research results with him.

He even reported his advisor for academic misconduct on the way out.

It was glorious!

Turns out, a research workhorse who’s been tormented by a rotten advisor is an absolute powerhouse when set free.

He hadn’t even finished orientation before, on his third day, he was already asking his boss:

"This training is pointless. I wrote a grant proposal during my breaks. Where should I submit it?"

Now that’s some scientific passion.

His arrival hit the whole research department like a fiery tornado.

Everyone was blown away.

Moved and terrified, they all started working harder, some even in tears.

Excellent! The energy was back!

"His name is Luo Xuan," Lin Jianyuan said with a grin. "He’s a real powerhouse. I just mentioned it to him, and three hours later, he cranked out a whole thesis. Unbelievable."

He was a pro at this!!!

Of course, he didn’t just whip up a dissertation from scratch in three hours.

After all, the insect repellent—well, clarifying agent—was already his research focus.

He had a pile of data ready to go.

"Oh," his roommate said, "You even remembered his name."

"It’s a unique name—like DNA double helix, perfect for a scientist..." Lin Jianyuan caught the tone and laughed, "Wait, baby, are you jealous?"

"You’ve never praised anyone else like that," his roommate mumbled.

"What? No way," Lin Jianyuan protested. "I compliment you way more! I even said your instant noodles were amazing today!"

"But I’m not even human," his roommate pouted.

But his little tail was swishing back and forth.

Lin Jianyuan pounced, hugging his wife into a ball and rubbing his face against him. "You’re jealous~ My baby gets jealous too~"

He thought his roommate would deny it, but instead, he nodded and said seriously, "Yeah. I’m jealous."

Lin Jianyuan froze.

His roommate said, "I’m jealous of humans. Jealous of the sheets. Jealous of the air conditioner. I want to eat you up and keep you in my belly, take you everywhere, so I won’t have to be jealous anymore."

Lin Jianyuan: "..."

His roommate looked a little uneasy and touched his face. "What’s wrong? Did I scare you? I was just talking, I won’t really eat you!"

"No, I’m not scared, baby. I just thought of The Little Prince," Lin Jianyuan suddenly laughed. "If I’m in your belly, would we look like a hat?"

His roommate blinked.

Then he got it and started laughing too.

The two of them rolled and squirmed on the soft, smooth sheets.

They mimicked the book’s line: "The boa swallows its prey whole, without chewing, and then it can’t move for six months while it digests and sleeps."

They laughed until they were tangled up together.